The Netherlands (I)

Why Should You NEVER Travel to 
the Netherlands?

Adapted from TRAVELTIPS4LIFE.COM

So, you think you'd like to go check out the Netherlands, do you? Your friends have taken vacations there and have come back to tell you how awesome it is. Well, we've got news for you: They're lying to you. There's absolutely no good reason that you or anyone else should ever travel to the Netherlands for a vacation. Check out these reasons before you buy a plane ticket:

1. Culture. Who Needs It?

The absolutely last thing that you ever want to face when you're on a vacation is a new culture! The unfamiliar can be frightening, and it's much better if you're surrounded by the people, language, art, music, and environments that you're already used to. There's simply too much new in the Netherlands to get used to. Sounds like work to us!

2. Amsterdam, More Like Amster-snooze

All right, we know that you've heard an awful lot about Amsterdam. You've probably seen some pictures of it, too. Well, Amsterdam is not all that it's cracked up to be! Sure it's full of plenty of interesting places to drink and smoke (we'll get to that). But, do you know what else it's full of? Really old buildings. And, if there's one thing that's boring, it's a really old building.

3. Bunch of Pot-Smoking Hippies

This is probably the reason that you've heard so much about Amsterdam. As we understand it, it's incredibly easy to get your hands on all the marijuana you'd ever want to smoke. In fact, they have bars that are specifically designed for the purpose of smoking it. You know what that means, right? Amsterdam is full of pot smoking hippies that like to laugh, eat food and have a good time. That is the absolute worst!

4. Too Much Cheese

This is fair warning for those of you out there who are lactose intolerant or suspect that you might be. The Netherlands makes some of the best cheese in the entire world! How awful is that for you? You'll just be tempted as you move from storefront to storefront. All of those delicious cheese wedges, just staring you in the face, begging to be eaten. Even if you're not lactose intolerant, just think of all the calories! Better have a salad instead.

5. Too Much Fun

With all of the stuff going on in centers like Amsterdam, as well as in many small towns that dot the landscape, the people of the Netherlands have a lot of fun. If you're the kind of person that just can't stand to be around people who seem like they're having a better time than you are, this can make travelling around the Netherlands that absolute worst. Best to avoid the country altogether, then!

6. Who Wants to Ride a Bike?

If there's a favorite pastime in the Netherlands, it's riding bikes. You see, they have beautiful countryside with not-well-travelled roads lining it, as well as dirt paths, where people can hop onthe back of a bike to get around. Being on vacation is about relaxing! It's not about getting exercise and pedaling up and down hills from windmill to windmill.